Category: QOTD

“The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him.”
– Russell Baker

“Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law.”
– Hubert Humphrey

“Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.”
– Oscar Levant

“The main result of feminism has been the Dutch Treat.”
– Nora Ephron

“Growth for the sake of growth is the ideology of the cancer cell.”

– Edward Abbey

“A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that ‘individuality’ is the key to success.”
– Robert Orben

“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.”
– Mae West

“In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.”
– Mark Twain

“The Vatican is against surrogate mothers. Good thing they didn’t have that rule when Jesus was born.”
– Elayne Boosler

“If England treats her criminals the way she has treated me, she doesn’t deserve to have any.” – Oscar Wilde